Down

Rebel. Feeling far from God. Is it possible to forget the First Love? I don't know why. Someone said when her relationship with her earthly father improved, her relationship with our heavenly father become intimate as well. Love is hard. Patience is hard. We want to get what we want...instantly. Joseph waited. Abraham waited. How? I just hope that I can remember His love everyday.

Next chapter

Seems like everything has come to an end this year, and leaving a trailer for the next new chapter. Everything may change next year, or may not. I don't know. No one knows. Whatever challenges that might come, I could only face it. I would love to travel more often. I really love travelling, especially getting to know different cultures and environment, and sight-seeing. Reminder to self: I'm not the best, but I'm trying my best in everything I do. Fighting!

Friends

It's been more than one year I'm living in this town that I did not grow up in. I still don't have anyone I can rant face to face. This is a small town, I might fear of gossip spreading. Or, I don't know. Maybe it takes more time for me to become best friends with others. My school friends, they are quite hard to gather. Everyone seems to have their own schedule. They don't seem eager to spend money either. I guess I'm the only one who is free all the time. The friends I met in church, mostly eager to find their life partner, busy getting married and having babies. Sigh.

End of the year

Wow, it's November now!
My achievement:

• finish reading the New Testament
• driving skill
• have a car
• join a dancing class...yoohoo
• have a job

Other challenges I would like to do in the future:

• setting up a professional blog
• learn to speak another language
• travel more 

Life unexpected

Recently I received a news that may change my future. Having settled down in current job, I was worried of the unknown. I was anxious. I did not know if that was what I want. At that time, I saw this verse: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." I prayed hard, read about Abraham's obedience, and surrendered it to the Lord.

Habit starts small

There's so much focus on habit now, on the internet. Books, blogs, experiments. Not going into the details. The conclusion is to start with something so easy that you could do everyday. It HAS to be so easy that you could laugh at it. For example, jump once a day. When it becomes a habit, you will jump more without hesitation. That explains why I couldn't do all of that I wanted to do earlier. So I will seek something easier. Listen to Korean audio everyday, going to start with 5-10 minutes. Reading one financial book currently. For drawing, the practices gone bad recently, don't know why it reached the peak and after that getting worst. One thing I learn, I only get the best result when I least stress about the result. Such an irony. It's quite hard to relaxed when drawing under expectation. Expectation of myself to myself.

I didn't

I didn't:
1. draw everyday
2. write in Korean
3. write technical analysis

I feel awful. Want to declutter my house. The condition of the house reflects one's life. If it's a mess, then also is the life. That's what I read.